Interests:Not really an interest, but more of a passion.Im a dancer, searching for improvements and hoping to be an outstanding dancer one day. NRA is family. Occupation:Student Industry:NgeeAnn Poly
Im going for freshie bondnight today!!! And tomorrow freshie camp showcase!!!
LIKE FINALLY. I TOTALLY MISS NRA ALREADY!!! Gonna pack up and chiong down now LOLOL =p
Most likely going for midnight show, and ton.. Cos we got no place to stay! =/ Lol nvm. Morning go school sleep and wait for the showcase to start =)
Ok bye people! Wooooohoooooo. Cant wait for later =DDD
8 oct, thur
imy.
For the whole day, It feels like i've watched a million videos... My FB is FLOODED with videos.. But okay, at least i did something else too.. i packed my closet! So that's an achievement.. =p
I learnt SO MUCH from all the videos that i've watched today. Yutong says its all dope ok!!! HAHAHA. This is the life of a boring lonely girl. At first I planned to swim or go library but... PUI LA say only =/ LOL
The vids i posted are super diverse... Gross, horror, love, morals.. so yeah.. Im gona post some here!
He's the best. "Sometimes in life, when you fall down and you feel like you dont have the strength to get up.. do you think you have hope? I will try 100times to get up, and if i fail 100 times, i fail, and i try again, and again... it will not be the end."
Beautifully imperfect. I love this video... "In the end, its these small things that you remember, the little imperfections that make them perfect, for you."
For this one... i swear i cried until... i dunno how to say. That gave me alot of strength to finally.. said it. Cos, i dont like the fact that, people always wait till the last minute till its too late that kind.. And the thing is, im so straightforward so high so open, But i dunno why am i so weak when it comes to love.. lol. So im gonna CHANGE. *wahaha* ok kidding, no evil laughters. But really la.. im gonna.. change for the better. Life's short, dont let any regrets come in. And, thats how i feel for you now, and nothing's gonna change it. At least for now...
And even if you dont.. it's okay :) Im feeling this way, and i accept it, instead of running away from it. =)
7 oct, wed
I laid on bed at 1am. It's 2am now cos i cant fall asleep...
IM SOOOOO SERIOUS NOW...
I reallyyyyy missssssssssssssssssssss youuuu pig....... And i think im gonna break the rulesss already.. Whatever that i typed below... i still cannot stop thinking!
"Is it possible to resist the temptation of love?"
My answer now is....
...Nooooo... awwww wo de yi ke xin~~~
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"Emotions VS Reality"
Love is patient.. Love is kind.. Love is not greedy.. Love is not selfish.. Love is not jealous.. Love is not irritable.. Love covers all things.. Love has faith for all things.. Love hopes in all things.. Love endures in all things.. Love is not self-seeking.. Love keeps no record of wrongs.. Love always protects.. Love always trusts.. Love always perserveres..
Im not fit to love.. Cos im not doing any of the above.
You make me smile.. You make me feel happy.. But i realised something.. Im asking for more.. and more.. and more.. Love should not be greedy.. Love should not expect, but should instead, accept.. And these are somethings that i've been trying to work on since last time.. But till now.. i dont think i managed to do it. So end of the day is, Im not fit to love anyone, especially you.. Whom i'll never want to hurt. So until i learnt what is love, and how to love..
Somethings in life can never be rushed.. If you're meant to be.. you will be. And if its not yours to be, you just need to learn to let go..
You were initially someone far from my reach. So far that.. the present feels like a dream. But now that I've reached you.. I should be contented already. =)
It's going to be a tough journey ahead (i foresee~) But i'll pass through it... It may starts to hurt.. it may starts to fade.. But no matter what, I hope i know and be able to have what's best for me, my life.
Off to studio now! Dance dance. And Jiayou everyone for Red camp! "Lil mama gets Krazy!" hahahaha =p
6 oct, tue
OKAY relax shirley!!! AHHH but so sad!!! MSN hanged! And the next thing that happens is...
"Wait for the program to respond" OR "Close the program"
OF COURSE I CLICK WAIT LA... cos... All information or msn chats that i had just now will be gone!! Aiya BUT I KNEW ITS NOT GONNA WORK =(( And i know i got no choice but to close the program and taadaa! Everything is gone... actually, i only care about our msn chat =/
CAN I SUE MSN??? Cos it shouldnt give me false hope in askin me to choose btw 2 options when obviously one doesnt works at all..!! Rahhhh. Im grumpy now... =/ Pardon me~
I wanna go back to the NORMAL SHIRLEY when with you... the one who goes crazy and high and hyper and NEVER THINK/HOPE/EXPECT MUCH when chatting~ And only feeels happiness and laughters and smiles and grins when talking.. no worries, no nothing.. I MISS BEING LIKE THIS. I think i need to STOP THINKING.. S.E.R.I.O.U.S.L.Y stop thinking. Alright, im gona do it. AND I WILL DO IT. =) Come on jiayou shirley. Hahaha. You are still gonna be the one that makes me go AWWWWWW and wanna pinch you cos u so cute hahahaha. OK I FEEL BETTER =D
I shall forget about the twonights that were not really good in a way...cos imy...It really felt like forever lehh okayyy=/ BUT nvm...ITS OVER =]
Had an enjoyable steamboat gathering at Ben's place =D
Thank you ben and staceyyy. You two like married couple like that already..hahaha. Not bad ah stacey.. i see potential in you =p OKOK PLEASE DUN POST THE UGLY PICS.. PLEASEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE. I'LL BE GOOD!!!
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For the first time, i felt my heart missing you. I dunno what im supposed to feel abt this. Cos i feel.. very insecure.. no assurance.. And i dunno whether if its the emptiness within me thats yearning for you..
I dont know what happened in the past.. But i saw somethings.. of the past.. that.. Grabbed my heart, i almost couldnt breathe. And then i judged you by first impression of what i saw.. And now i wanna apologise.. Cos i shouldnt have done that. I dont even know about anything.. and i judged you. I think i suck real badly ='( Maybe.. cos it matters to me, so i flustered..
Taken from shufang's blog..
And true indeed.. thats how i feel now..
I wanna feel secured.. I wanna be assured.. I wanna feel concerned.. I dont need a lot of things.. I just simply need to know that i matters to you.
='( I need a hug so badly.. so badly..
I just wanna be happy...
2 oct, fri
From tonight, everyday if possible, i will look back at a little something from the past, and miss you, and be thankful, and just.. learn to smile out of it.
It's almost close to a year.. in one more month's time.. since i met you.. and i think.. or rather i believe, you're the first person i really loved.. love in terms of.. so many things.. too many already.. i lost count. And when it was time to end it all, i never ever had the strength to really look back at it again. Never.. It was too hard..
Im getting better in life.. dunno how are you.. but i know you are great =] Im good too.. Missed you, but im still good.
Thanks my dear friends for talking to me.. wanting to make sure im fine.. n all.. THANKS, cos it means alot, and i really needed support too =) Im not crying as much already.. or rather, i never really cry already.. so dun give up on me.. I think alot, i may emo, but im not that weak already..
Its been so long, n i knw confirm wil feel like, wah want to give up on me already.. but yeah.. i really hope you all will have faith in me.. that i can do it.. even though its been so long.. and yah, just dun give up on me, and i'll show it to you that i made it.
It's like my first love. Maybe thats why, it's the hardest.
But i promise myself i'll walk out of the fears and all.. and look forward, have hopes on my future.. be happy, stay happy.. smile.. and keeep smiling.. and i guess, thats what i need most in my life. =)
But for now, although i yearn for love.. for a shoulder.. for a hug.. i think i'll try to take things real slow... or maybe not even think about it for the moment. I dont know whether not thinking about it will do us good or not.. maybe it will..? Or maybe it wont cos no matter what, i still have to start thinkin about it.. I shall try not to run away from it.. but yah, i hope i have an answer to myself, my heart, soon. Only then, i'll start walking from there.. either alone, or not. But either ways, i'll make sure i'll be happy, and thats the best for me.
"As long as it feels right, the rest doesn't matter."
But honestly, the rest really doesnt matter? I dun think so =/ I think this phrase only works for short-lived happiness.. Cos theres so many factors to having real happiness.. And with only one factor "feel", its not enough one..right? Sad to say, but its true.. Part of me reallyyyy wish to just nod my head vigorously with that phrase.. But another part of me knows, it will not last just like that.. Complicated, but i hope by the end of the day, i can feel right, with the rest being all good too. That would be the best.. hahaha.. which is the hardest ;) But i shall believe.. and believing is all i need now.
You're hot and you're cold. I dont feeeel good about it. But i guess, that's what its all about right? Getting your emotions all mixed up.. confused.. happy yet not at times.. ANYTHING also can feel.. You really make me go mad at times.. Mad in both ways though.. haha.. Thats good but not good too.. But oh well.. i guess i'll find my way through.. With my brain, and my heart..
Its funny how one can always yearn for something SO MUCH.. But when its infront of you already.. You may start to forget how you initially felt when craving for it. Cos there's so many things to think about.. And that, it's not that easy as it may seems..
Ok, things will fall in place no matter what. Just have faith :)
1 oct, thurs
Im seriously ok.. I just.. miss the past. I miss the piano.. everything.
Seriously, i think i need to run away from any piano melodies the moment i hear it.. It never fails to GRAB MY HEART and make it ache.. like now.. =.= gosh.. this is not good. Haha. Piano only!!! Im not gonna fall just because of this.. ok up up up i stand.
PS: Im really really ok． It's this song that triggers my emotions la.. its nice ok! Enjoy.
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I just want to, smile and be happy. It's that simple, BUT yet that hard. Maybe its that simple, but it just doesnt feel so.. I need to start to learn to use my head, not just my heart. And i do my best to make sure that, i will not make any selfish decisions that will hurt myself, especially the person i care about.
As long as you love me...? Or maybe.. not?
29 sept, Tue
Im having PMS. Ok what a start for a post. HAHA. But its true! The bad thing is, yahh.. i have quite a bad mood and attitude.. The good thing is, this moodswing SWINGS for a better side, which made me started to have the urge to cook dinner. So yeah.. i cooked dinner for my family! Hahaha. *show haolian face* JUST KIDDING LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA. HOW TO HAOLIAN?!?!?!?!
When it was a DIsAsTeR... LOLOLOL!!
Pictures time! =DD
Its just the beginning....
Then all of a sudden...
LOLOLOLOL. It roll off the table okay!!! This one is the ultimate joke of the day. So i concluded it a disaster HAHAHAHA.
Jeffrey's fruit juice concoction (duno how to spell la.. lol) IT WAS THE PERFECT JUICE. DAMN NICE LOR! Apple + Orange + Pear = WONDERJUICE
Finally!
Hahaha, i told my mum already... As long as im around, it will forever be the simplest dishes LOLOL!!! I lousy la.. but really sia... i think these dishes are the simplest to cook.. So... I PLAN TO MARRY A COOK. HAHAHAHA. Ok laa i will try and learn to cook.. i TRY okay. I need motivation la. Maybe when i have a boyfriend or something then the urge will become stronger. Hahaha.. for now.. its still cui~ LOL.
But still, im proud of myself! =D
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I never really blog pictures of suntec here cos theres like HUNDREDSSSSS OF THEM.. hahaha.. so yeah, i just post some that i took..
Thanks freshies for the purple flower =) I was really touched and love it to bits! =D
Thanks DOU peeps for the balloon and flower =))
Thanks for all the gifts (: (: (: And Thanks Hey!Thursday ONCE AGAIN =) I miss you girls sooo much, i miss trainings, i miss fun and laughters and all haha.. just really, thanksss dearestssss!
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Francis's birthday celebration 09 =)
Better be a good boy ok? Iloveyou =)
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Ok im gonna go continue watch Fann Wong's wedding on tv! Awww.
Training camp is really... dope. I will do my best to remember everyth that i've learnt and yeah... Thanks EVERYONE, thanks NRA for just... EVERYTHING (:
THE SECRET - is a dope documentary man. Too much to learn from it. Maybe one day i'll watch it again. =)
And YEAH i have strong movie cravings now! 1) PHOBIA 2 2) Time traveler's wife 3) Ugly truth 4) Darah (the poster is damn disgusting and eerie!)
Ok But yah Phobia2 is top priority first! I watched the trailer and i chua sai. Like seriously damn scared LOLOLOL. But then, still wanna watch for its chua-sai-ness hahaha.
And thank you people for concern abt my eyes. Its getting better :) And yeah, i'll takecare! Then i can finally go out and have datings already ok! Haha. My girlfriends better wait for me ok =)
Melise is like SO DAMN SWEET lor. Although you only gave me 1 sentence in ur blog HAHA kidding la =p I know you love me =D
Thanks for your "Thankyou" note via msn HAHA! =P
She blesses and wishes me luck in love awwww. So cute can this. Its me tapping my Prince charming(whos looking away therefore the eyes hahaha!)
THANK YOUUUU MELISE though i always spam you =P
Let's cross the love bridge together HAHAHA. You holding... erm.. someone's hand LOLOLOL I'll just be behind you =p Aiya ok la actually i hope i'll be holding someone's hand too HAHA!! KIDDDDDDING. We're always mad when we talk abt such things hahaha. =P
WO AI NI MEN. And again, i still wanna say, I LOOK SEXY SIA!! *bite lips* I 想红 la HAHAHA.
Ok la i shall end this post. And girlfriend, thanks for being here (: Love you okay (:
Im quite easily contented by small things in life. I just want things to be simple. I just want my life to be simple. I just want happiness.. full of happiness and smiles. My family, friends, and love(:
Thanks, for brightening my days, bit by bit, here and there =) 25 sept, friday
All right! Im gonna set off for training camp in... around 1 hour. MISS ME, ok? ^^
And thanks zoe, for the chat with me. Means ALOT of support and encouragement and love =)
"When you play, the music will always grow unbearably sweet, I couldnt speak."
I love this quote. Cos its beautiful. And probably this was how it worked in the past.
I downloaded like 26 piano songs by Yiruma yesterday night. Haha. Each melodies just never fails to calm me down, or trigger my emotions. His songs are magic =) Haha.
I dint know that, the past can actually made me fear so much of the present and future.. and i feared so much that i can just burst out crying (which im not gonna do so).. Just that.. yah.. the present and future was kind of too scary for me to even think about it.. WHICH IS SO SAD!!! Like i dont want to have this thoughts.. i dont want to have these fears... and im gonna be strong and make myself overcome the past.. Cos i wanna smile happily for my present and look forward with lots of hopes for my future.
Teach me how to smile.
Haha.. someone said to flex your cheek muscles, try to curve your eyes a little.. And true indeed it works immediately for me~ Haha.. Ok la... im NOT EMO. I just need to stop the fear inside me.. which i need some time.. Cos i will not let the fear eat me up.. Thats an aim. =)
I got something funny and... embarrassing (to me) to show! LOL.
I cooked something...
BOOHOO. BUT IT LOOKS SO LIKE SHIT!!! But can u tell what im cooking? Its noodles, with egg, and sausage.. even got the smoke nice smell~ hahahaha.
But i got owned awww hahahaha. This one looks so much more tempting and eat-able. hahaha. Gosh im gonna improve my cooking..... one day. LOL.
=)))
22 sept, Tuesday
SUNTEC IS FINALLY OVER (but how i wish it didnt cos i miss my HEY! THURSDAY badlyyy!)
When i was on my way home after finals, i was like listening to our choreo song on mp3 on repeat mode.. and unknowingly i listened to it for very very long~~ thinking back about all the times we had, the laughters; joy; fun; tears; upset; stress; talks etc... so many things happened in this journey... and only the 7 of us will understand how much it really meant =)) I really love u girls!! Ahhhh. Hahaa. Way beyond words to express.. but yeah, i'll miss the whole suntec journey with u all =]
But finals was horrible for me, as in, not dance wise, but yah my eyes...
=((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((
It hurts so damn bad that i missed pre-training camp.. and now, it looks like it wont recover on training camp days... ahhhhhhhh I WANNA GO.. But really... my eyes... i want it to recover sooon please =(
I think after this picture NO GUYS WOULD WANT ME ALREADYYYY OMGGGGGGGGGGGG COS ITS SO FREAKING UGLYYYY.
I misss my eyesssssssss.
Continue to love me please! LOL. Damn la... its holidays and im supposed to go out CHILL AND SHOP AND ALL.. but now im stuck at home =((( *prays for speedy recovery*
Gonna rest now!~
And cant wait for mahjong! Hahahaha =P
17 sept, thursday
Im back to normal =) Ignore the previous entry..! With all the pointless ramblings... im okay already! ^^ Hehe.. im happy, contented, and can smile like normal again le =) I dont need much from you, because just a little bit and i know it's enough for me already. Hahaha.
Geena is just soooo sweeet like aww =))) Love you (: And thank you =)
Anyways, i cant wait for suntec training camp, freshie camp (I PRAY), hangouts with all my friends, and enjoy holiday TO THE MAX before school starts. *screamssss*
It's like what.. 3days to Suntec.. saturday got rehearsal somemore.. so its like, we left with friday to be exact, to CLEAN AND EVERYTH. Hey! Thursday, dont give up, have faith, we've come so far AS ONE, and we will do it together =) I love each and everyone of you, cos its really so rare and just miracles for us to get together... awwww. *touch my heart* =)) LOVES.
